My fat phase (or: the time I was a little bit chunky)

Hello there my growing pack!!

What a great first week in Blogland I've had! Thanks to all my new friends for taking the time to drop by, leave a comment, and follow my adventures.

You are all the best!

I'm so excited I made a meme

Now before we go any further, there is something I feel I should get off my chest.

This is quite hard for me to admit, so bear with me as I build up the courage to share my shame...

Wait for it....

Okay - here we go...

As you all know, I'm an incredibly handsome man -

Adore me - you know you want to

But.. And here's the shocking part -

I. Haven't. Always. Been. This. Handsome.

*GASP!!!*

What?! But you're so spunky!!

I know, it's hard to believe. But even someone as genetically blessed as myself goes through bad patches, and there was none worse than my dreaded Fat Phase.

What a lard-arse

As you can see, I was a real wobbler - an obese little rolly polly.

In fact, if you'd decked me out in pink Lycra I'm sure I would have been mistaken for a baby hippo.

I have no idea how it happened. But I blame mum.

You see, when I first arrived, I was perfect -

Eight weeks old and perfect.

And mum was (understandably) besotted.

Of course I'm adorable but PUT ME DOWN

So when I wanted something - ANYTHING - she simply couldn't say no:

An extra helping of food?

Of course

Another treat?

Why not?

Maybe a snifter more ice cream?

Take the whole tub.

The weight crept up on me like the evil cat that lives down the end of my street, and before I knew what had happened, I went from being the park stud to the park dud :(

My friends were suddenly too fast and agile for me, and other humans were commenting on my "unusual shape."

Please don't walk away.. I'm still the same great guy :(

It was devastating.

Mum took me to the vet, and I was made to stand on a stupid metal thing, while humans tut-tutted and shook their heads.

The scales are clearly broken - I'm outta here

And then - as if the humiliation I'd already suffered wasn't bad enough - it happened...

I was put on a strict rationing system that I can only assume was taken from ancient Medieval torturing rituals.

I was put on a "DIET."

Suddenly my ample servings of food were halved...

Are you joking?!

My treats were restricted to just one a day...

That's a ridiculously small-sized cupcake

And my lavish helpings of human treats were scrapped. Entirely.

Give. Me. The. Dixie. Cup.

At times I feared the hunger pains I suffered would overcome me -

Sooooooooo hungry

But after a while, something remarkable happened!

I got a renewed spring in my step...

Springy

I could keep up with my friends again...

Well... almost...

And - best of all - I got my unbelievable good looking body back!!!

Look at that svelte silhouette!

It was a rough time - but I made it through.

And thank goodness I'm back to being spunky - not chunky.

Until next time!!! 

"...because there's nothing minor about being a Morris..."