What a great first week in Blogland I've had! Thanks to all my new friends for taking the time to drop by, leave a comment, and follow my adventures.
You are all the best!
|I'm so excited I made a meme|
Now before we go any further, there is something I feel I should get off my chest.
This is quite hard for me to admit, so bear with me as I build up the courage to share my shame...
|Wait for it....|
As you all know, I'm an incredibly handsome man -
|Adore me - you know you want to|
But.. And here's the shocking part -
I. Haven't. Always. Been. This. Handsome.
|What?! But you're so spunky!!|
|What a lard-arse|
As you can see, I was a real wobbler - an obese little rolly polly.
In fact, if you'd decked me out in pink Lycra I'm sure I would have been mistaken for a baby hippo.
I have no idea how it happened. But I blame mum.
You see, when I first arrived, I was perfect -
|Eight weeks old and perfect.|
And mum was (understandably) besotted.
|Of course I'm adorable but PUT ME DOWN|
So when I wanted something - ANYTHING - she simply couldn't say no:
An extra helping of food?
Maybe a snifter more ice cream?
|Take the whole tub.|
The weight crept up on me like the evil cat that lives down the end of my street, and before I knew what had happened, I went from being the park stud to the park dud :(
My friends were suddenly too fast and agile for me, and other humans were commenting on my "unusual shape."
|Please don't walk away.. I'm still the same great guy :(|
It was devastating.
Mum took me to the vet, and I was made to stand on a stupid metal thing, while humans tut-tutted and shook their heads.
|The scales are clearly broken - I'm outta here|
And then - as if the humiliation I'd already suffered wasn't bad enough - it happened...
I was put on a strict rationing system that I can only assume was taken from ancient Medieval torturing rituals.
I was put on a "DIET."
Suddenly my ample servings of food were halved...
|Are you joking?!|
|That's a ridiculously small-sized cupcake|
And my lavish helpings of human treats were scrapped. Entirely.
|Give. Me. The. Dixie. Cup.|
At times I feared the hunger pains I suffered would overcome me -
But after a while, something remarkable happened!
I got a renewed spring in my step...
I could keep up with my friends again...
And - best of all - I got my unbelievable good looking body back!!!
And thank goodness I'm back to being spunky - not chunky.
Until next time!!!